10 Things I miss About Cable TV July 29, 2010

When all else fails, make a list…

1. On Demand - I love this feature. I guess it works if you have some other pay channel too but we always do HBO and I love most of their series. Ever since Dream On (WAY before On Demand). I was too young to be watching but I loved sneaking down stairs and watching that show, boobies and all. Of course, Sex in the City was a great show to watch with the girls but in the last 5-7 years HBO has been doing some really creative stuff.
2. Guiding Light - Of course, even if I had cable it would be a moot point because they canceled the longest running soap in history (Bastards). I watched this show with my Mom as a kid (since 8-9 years old maybe). Up until a year ago, I was still keeping up with it via online synopsis at the very least and watching online episodes on occasion once I figured out how that worked. I loved the cheezey plot lines, the fact that each woman on there had 7-10 last names because they had been married so many times. When I was a kid, I imagined my family was just like the Lewis clan (of course then I grew up and realized that I did not want my Mom to die every 3-4 years then return from the dead)
3. Hallmark Commercials - Especially around the holidays… that one where the big brother came home from college? That one killed me. I cried like a baby.
4. “Power” Wars or “Who’s got the power” (power = the remote) - This only works if you live with someone who likes to have multiple universal remotes. I have not lived with such a person since childhood but damn that could be funny (and also a real pain in the arse).
5. DVR – No commercials nuff said.
6. Law & Order - I loved that no matter what time of day, what day of the week… you could find an episode of Law & Order at all times. (Ditto for the movie Roadhouse).
7. Weather/Natural Disaster Updates – OK, I know I miss it now because I don’t have this luxury but I really hate it when I actually have cable because the local news beats a horse to death and it gets pretty depressing after awhile. Still it is nice when you see smoke on the horizon to be able to turn on a local station and see which part of the neighborhood is on fire. Ditto for Richter Scale readings.
8. Background noise – I hate being alone in a house that is too quiet. Sometimes I need some background noise.
9. Discovery Channel/Animal Planet – These channels have awesome programming and I am usually not afraid for Mogo to be in the room while they are on.
10. Infomercials - These are great at 2:00 a..m. when you can’t sleep. I always have to fight not to buy the worlds coolest gadgets. I think this is genetic… my mother bought a Flowbee 1990? Maybe it was 1991… and she used it too. That is how I got my hair cuts in high school; with a Flowbee. I should also mention that not only did my Mom have and use a Flowbee, she burned it out after 7 years and had to hunt down a new one to replace it.

All that said… there is one big reason I do not miss cable at all… The Disney Channel. With the exception of Phineas & Ferb (who rock), I could go my whole life and never see another Hannah Montana episode again. It is worth it not to have cable because I don;t have to argue about programming choices or time limits on the TV watching.  Occasionally (Like on Sunday night when True Blood is about to start) I think about ordering again…. then Mogo will come out of her room singing a song from Hannah or from High School Musical and it seals the deal.

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